Orange juice, Tea and hockey pucks... I mean "Scones"

Yesterday I did a very dumb thing. There is burger joint down the block from the hotel that I have fallen in love with called Byrons. The people are nice, the food is good and it does not mean I need a waver to sell off she-who-feeds-the-cats.... I mean my firstborn. Problem was that I wanted an outdoor table yesterday (cause it was SUNNY) and the only table available was behind two people playing "lets see who is the best chimney!" So my throat was inflamed when I went home, which means I woke up this morning to find my throat is sore and my nose is stuffy. A little under the weather today. Kinda like London right now, its drizzling lightly. So I decided to have a light day today and went the Victory and Albert Museum (aka the V & A).

I thought I was going to see a lot of antiques or something (was not quite sure what I was expecting to be honest), but it was not what I got.

This is what I walked into. I am sure my inner shriek of delight scared dogs for miles. It was more then I could have hoped for. They things from Korea.

Things from China and Japan. Things from the middle east, including this one here.

They even had some more modern sculptures and an entire floor dedicated to jewelry that went back all the way to Medieval times.  It was splendiferous! I would do it again in a heart beat! Three hours in though I ran out of batteries... completely. It was one of those instances where I would have sold my foot for a package of double AAs. But I suppose it was for the best. It meant I had to take pictures more carefully as now I had to tease the last few bits of power out of my spent ones. Here are some of my favorites.

The tops is a close up of some of the detail on a kimono in the Japan part. The next one is a bit of the painted ceiling in the stair case leading upstairs (well it is the VICTORIA and Albert Museum, if they did not make it at least a little hoity toity I think London would have imploded). The third picture from the top is actually a sculpture that was silhouetted in a window for some odd reason, I thought it was horrendously pretty like that.

I was walking down this corridor when I entered another sculpture room (yay, there billions of those) but this one had a window out into an exhibit with a giant carved column and lots of giant crosses and sarcophagi. The Sarcohpagi were from abandoned or ruined abbeys in England mostly, and had people carved in effagy on them. I personally loved the gigantic Celtic cross standing in the middle of the room. The Random Wooden Stair case (which I am sure has a proper name that I can't remember now) looked so oddly out of place, I could not help but take a quick photo.  The random guy there (hi random guy that totally did not know I was including him in the photo on purpose cause I am weird) just kinda seemed to complete it.

I wish I could have taken more photos. Curse my lack of batteries and fore thought. But I did manage to have a Delicious lunch there. With a scone that tasted like it descended from Mount Scone to kick any scone I had ever tasted back into remedial school.... or something like that. Did I mention the scone was good?

I left a little early as I was getting a stuffy head headache and went back to the Hotel for a little nap. When I woke up I saw I still had enough time to run over to the Wallace Collection. The Wallace Collection is housed in what used to be a family home, its near the Bond Street Station, and has an eclectic collection of weapons, armor, art and sculpture. I was really excited as a friend had recommended the place to me, and I had enough time to have High Tea in its inner atrium. Boy was I disappointed. Not by the collection, that was neat. But I could not take any pictures.

Not that they posted a sign were I could see that, nope tucked that away in a corner they did. Got yelled at by guard. That was fun. I apologised and flushed cause it was embarrassing and he started back peddling realizing it was a mistake. Told me there was a sign some where saying the same, on my way out I actively looked for it. It still took me a little bit to find. Dear people running the Wallace Collection that will never read this blog cause I am small fries, might want to post that sign on the doors coming in and have a stand near the stair case, like they do at Windsor Castle. One tiny sign at a desk simple does not cut it especially when dealing with dumb tourists like me. Cause I am dumb. Its the blonde hair, it goes to the roots it does.

So I finished up looking around the first floor, which happens to have lots of swords, armor and old guns with the faintest smatterings of Art. I was starting to enjoy myself again, and I have to say, the English need to rearrange scabbards and blades into intricate patterns is kind of amusing. You have things meant to deal death in precise and pretty formations all over the place. The two fully armoured horse and riders was quite impressive. The highlight for me though was the one guard tucked away in a corner slowly dosing off. I don't know why, but it did strike me as funny.

By the time I was through with the first floor, my throat was starting to throb and I decided it might be nice to try having High Tea in the Atrium at the center of the house. The dining area is gorgeous, with intricate wire chairs and lovely sculptures interspersed through out the yard. The chairs had large red cushions to sit on and it was very comfortable. The setting was perfect to imagine yourself as lady or lord sitting down to tea in your court yard. You could be down right prissy if you wanted to.

At least until the staff at the cafe got to you. I entered and read a lovely sign in front of the hostess podium asking patrons to "kindly wait to be seated". So did so. For a good thirty minutes. I guess the hostess was on break or something. Though I am at a loss as to what the 7 or so staff helping the 15 or so guests in the cafe (I had a lot of time, I could count) were doing. I caught the eyes of a couple of them so that maybe they could at least acknowledge I exist, that did not work. It took me doing the "my back is about to burst and my feet hurt" dance afore some one came and showed me to a table. This was after a gentleman waited with me before deciding to maybe try some where else. The only reason why I didn't was because dammit, I was in the perfect setting to pretend I was in Pride and Prejudice, or something less embarrassing, and I was going to have tea here if it took me shaking one of the waiters to, you know, do their job. Well I get to the table (which is next to a dirty table) and I think "all right it was probably after a rush, give them some time to breathe and clean up and it should get better". The waiter said "I will bring you a menu in a few minutes" and promptly left me there.

For half an hour.

I was starting to think "Pride and Prejudice (or something less embarrassing) can suck it." When a different waiter came to clear the dirty table they had originally sat me at and realised that he had forgotten about me. Ah heh. Please do note that when I asked tersely for a menu and asked if it had been busy he told me "no not really" and toddled off.

But whatever I had a Menu now. I could order High Tea, and pretend I am in something less embarrassing then Pride and Prejudice (I decided Pride and Prejudice could suck it after all). The tea came after waiting another half an hour, and well, I have had better. The high tea tray was lovely, at least it was until I got to the scone.

I love scones, I have made scones. Scones and me, we be peeps. This was a hockey puck. I could have taken some one out with it, that's how hard it was. That's when I decided the something less embarrassing then Pride and Prejudice can suck it as well, and left.

Ah well, at least I know where London gets its hockey pucks now.And on the bright side when I got back to the Hotel I was feeling better. I am just in the "nose gonna run alllll day" phase of things now, which is all right with me.


Until next time.